Some days, life can be a sitcom. Then others, it’s more like a commercial. In this case, a paper towel commercial.
The need for super absorbency, I should clarify. Not the beefy guy in a lumberjack shirt.
This isn’t a metaphor, unfortunately. Kids can make a heck of a mess.
My youngest two like to help any way they can. And by help, I mean make things worse but it’s well-intentioned. I realize that sometime in the foreseeable future I’ll be hard-pressed to get anyone to lift a finger. Like my oldest son now. Getting him to assist in chores is like prying a monkey from a tree.
As I was saying, J was bringing in groceries last night. It becomes a mini-tag team effort, with Buzz carrying a light bag absent of eggs or a sturdy gallon of milk by the handle. This time, though, I took the task a bit further by asking if he’d like to place the plastic jug of milk on the top shelf of the refrigerator. And that’s when it slipped out of his hands, hitting the ground like a bomb.
It was a vitamin A and D fortified crime scene. The floor was a sheen of opaque white, liquid splatters everywhere. Then, as I’m soaking up the evidence, I could swear I hear a stoic voice overhead narrating, “So soft and absorbent, these paper towels will pick up even the toughest of messes! It’s the quicker picker upper!”.
My cat probably thought he had gone to heaven.
As for me, I think I might watch too much TV.